


knives in a fist fight

by lesphos



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Female-Centric, Fluff, Friends to Enemies to Lovers, Pining, Slow Burn, kind of?, lots of yearning and pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22381750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesphos/pseuds/lesphos
Summary: "How do you love?Like a fist. Like a knife."Ada Limón.And then Andrea leaves, like if she didn't just tell Lena her narrative has gone rotten. Like she isn't meant to parallel her brother - bitter, small and forever Clark's sidekick.Except that now, she won't even be a sidekick. She's going to be a nemesis. An enemy to be taken down by Wycombe Abbey's golden girl. Kara Danvers.ORLex Luthor tried to kill his best friend, Clark Kent, at the campus' library of their boarding school. 2 years after the attempt of murder, Eton College and Wycombe Abbey aren't 30 minutes of road apart anymore, the roots of this story bringing the two schools closer than ever.That is because Kara Danvers and Lena Luthor will start a year together as classmates. The almost-murderer's sister and the beloved victim's cousin.And everyone is holding their breaths.
Relationships: Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lucy Lane, Lena Luthor & Andrea Rojas, Lena Luthor/Andrea Rojas, Samantha "Sam" Arias & Lena Luthor, Samantha "Sam" Arias/Lena Luthor
Comments: 60
Kudos: 171





	1. prologue — et tu, bruté?

**Author's Note:**

> hello, lgbts.
> 
> here i am, writing this british boarding school au no one asked for. also i suck at summaries. 
> 
> before we begin, however, i would like you to be aware: ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE.
> 
> i consider my self fluent enough to write this mess, but still, it isn't as smooth as writing in your own native language. so pardon me, in case you find some grammar mistakes and misuse of words. you're allowed to *kindly* point them out in the comments section (if you feel like it). i have a friend who's going to beta this for me but she's busy lately, and i've been too eager to post this prologue.
> 
> the idea for this story was born because i love the dark academia sub-genre and god, lena luthor just SCREAMS dark academia. she went to a boarding school on canon. a lesbian. 
> 
> talk to you in the endnotes.

  
  
"There's a good reason there is blood in my hands."

It's the first thing he blurts out when a pair of flashlights spot him. A silent thud followed by a grunt of pain behind him makes the two men run in their direction. His eyes wandered looking for a way out. Surrounded by books, the world outside walled by bookshelves and presumptions old furniture.

"Please," the chocked cry came from the boy bleeding to death on the wooden floor.

"Lex Luthor?" The name, spoken in a tone of surprise, made him smirk. He smiled at the black man that was currently towering over him. "Professor Henshaw."

"It's Clark Kent!" The second man, that hurried towards the fallen stabbed boy, shout out. "He needs medical assistance, _now_." So he pulled his cellphone. His other hand was occupied in pressuring the hole Lex's dagger opened in Clark's ribs.

Professor Henshaw was still starting at Lex Luthor in silent horror. His eyes split between his face and his bloodied hands.

"Self-defense?" Lex tried.

He knew, though, he was doomed.

* * *

**2 YEARS LATER**

She was doomed.

It's the rainy season in _every_ season in England, it seems.

The car came to a stop in front of ancient-looking gates. The white noise of the rain feeling the space between the two girls. They were postponing a goodbye.

"I don't think this is going to be as bad as you think." Her best friend, in the driver seat, whispered. Perhaps knowing she was walking in eggshells.

"But you _do_ think is going to be bad, don't you?" She bit back. The other girl sighs, relenting.

"I'm going to miss you, Lena." It makes Lena softens, in a way only her best friend is capable of. She steals a moment to look at the girl who drove her to the new purgatory. Samantha Arias. They've been friends for four years now. Lena is difficult, everything about her is difficult. She gave Sam more than enough reasons to run away, but they powered through. Somehow.

"I'm going to miss you, too." She hates how her voice sounds weak. It sounds weak every time she attempts to express anything but resentment and anger - but she says it, regardless. It's Luthor genetics, to be so qualified to sharp feelings and so untrained in warm ones. She fights it, anyway. For Sam, more than anyone else.

Sam pulls her in a hug. Her fingers grasp tightly in the girl's coat.

"You're going to be okay." Sam tries one more time. "You can text and call me at any time. And I'll see you Saturday."

Saturday. She has to survive six days without her best friend. Sam releases her from the embrace and she turns to glance at the place she will be living for the rest of the year. Wycombe Abbey. The most famous girls' boarding school in the world. And ranked top all-girls school in academic results. Founded over a century ago, it beholds a dark and romantic appearance. She might as well as be walking into _Hogwarts_.

She spots a woman walking towards the gates and she knows she's waited. Sam holds her hand once more.

"Time to go."

The woman receives her with a "welcome to Wycombe Abbey High, Miss Luthor" said in a nervous, hurriedly tone. She follows her past great green gardens and many structures designed with gothic architecture. A lot of girls, all adorned by the school's uniform, laughing and running to the main building - likely late to whichever class they had.

She wondered how many of these girls knew exactly who she was. How many of them are going to hate her. How many would whisper when she passed by.

They all _know_.

Not so far away from Wycombe Abbey, in approximately 30 minutes of a car ride, there is Eton College. The most prestigious all-boys boarding school in the world.

Two years ago, her older brother was a student there. A golden-star one. She remembers how Lex would pull an all-nighter every night. How she would sit in many events while teachers, parents and strangers would all praise her brother for his prodigy mind and immortal wit. She remembers the pride she felt of Lex, the happiness that would come when he hugged her. When he told her she would be the next one in victory.

She also remembers the bitter taste of Lex's anger every time he would come home at weekends after losing his spot on the team. The coldness of his eyes after he was told by Lillian to do _better_. The crisp trepidation in his hands when receiving a list where he wasn't the top one student.

Two years ago, her older brother attempted to murder his popular and beloved best friend, Clark Kent. In the classic beauty of Eton College's library, Lex stabbed his best-friend-turned-rival, changing Lena's life forever.

She lost her _best friend_. She found out her brother was a lunatic. She was about to start a year in a school where everyone knew her name and the bad blood behind it.

It didn't help the fact everyone _loved_ the Kents. A well-known family. Made of successful writers, journalists and anything else poetic enough to their standards. Their charity work and progressive political views could only strengthen it.

The Luthors are the complete opposite of that. Business owners. Conservatives that based the ideal of family in rules, tradition and obedience. Ambitious-driven academics whose only goal was of money, of achieving power, of expanding their name so much it would explode for the world to see.

And it did, when Lex plunged a knife between Clark's ribs.

"Miss Luthor?" Waking up from her daze, she reminded herself there was still an entire day ahead of her.

She followed the woman until a huge door made of wood was sporting a "Headmistress" sign.

"You may enter." She heard. The woman opened the door for her and left.

The first thing Lena sees is the enormous desk in the center of the room. A middle-aged blonde woman was sitting at the desk, wearing a fancy wine-colored dress.

"Headmistress Grant." Lena says, licking her lips, not noticing how anxious she became.

The woman looks at her and smiles.

"You can call me Mrs. Grant, Lena." She _purrs_. "Headmistress is a way too long word."

Lena likes the sound of her voice. But then again, this woman knows how nasty of a family she has. And is probably already having headaches dealing with the fact she has a Luthor on her campus. She won't fall for any charisma. She's not welcome here.

"I hardly think this going to be an easy year for you." Mrs. Grant eyes her pointedly. Lena's eyebrows jump in surprise. "But I do promise to give you my best support throughout it. I have the duty to educate you here and to make you reach your full potential. You're a brilliant young woman, Mrs. Luthor. You won't throw it all away in Wycombe Abbey, of all places."

Lovely. No warm welcome. Straight to the point.

Lena appreciates it.

"After leaving my room, you'll be led to your house." She stops at that and adjusts her glasses, reading the yellow paper in her hands. "I believe you've been placed at Campbell House."

Oh, yes. The students are sorted into _houses_. Each one of them has it's own color, housemistress and matrons. She did her research.

Hogwarts.

"I imagine your House Mother is already waiting for you outside. She was dismissed from her morning classes in order to welcome you. Mostly, to explain your schedules and house rules." She talks _at_ Lena very carefully as if asking her to be kind and behave. It annoys the hell out of her, but Lena bites her tongue. "You are a senior, so you're allowed to leave school grounds after 6 p.m. However, we have an 11 p.m curfew."

Four hours every weekday to runaway and spent time with Sam. She can manage it.

"I guess that's all for now. You are probably hungry," Mrs. Grant looks at her, catching a glimpse of the raindrops attached to Lena's skin and clothes. "and in need of your uniform. Everything else will be explained by your House Mother."

She finally stands up and offers her hand. Lena walks the remaining steps to shake it.

"I appreciate the care, Mrs. Grant." She licks her lips, again. "I'll be in my best efforts, all the time." Lena doesn't care for her approval, is completely uninterested if anything – but she says it anyway.

"I know." She replies, simply. It isn't unkind but it isn't complimentary either. "Welcome to Wycombe Abbey."  
  


Once she's outside, she takes a deep, deep breath. The rain stopped and the smell of wet grass calms her nerves. There's almost no one within view shot, the classes begin at 8 a.m – she peeks at her watch to discover that's still 8:40. Longest fucking day ever.

"Lena?" She gets startled by the voice. Not only because she thought she was alone, but because she recognizes it. She turns around thinking, there's no way-

"Andrea?!" The girl was staring at her, curiously. In full uniform, with her brown curls scattered across her shoulders. She looked way too good for Lena's taste.

"Long time no see." Her voice sounds sheepish, but the look in Andrea's face is a pleased one. Lena continues to gape at her.

"How the hell I didn't know you are going here?"

"Well, it's not like we stayed in touch-"

"You, of all people, are the first person I encounter here?" Andrea's expression turns somber and Lena regrets being hard. But before she can say anything Andrea continues,

"You don't know your luck, apparently." Andrea hisses. Lena doesn't understand what she means by that, but it's not like she's in the mood for her ex-girlfriend's dramatics. Andrea walks pass her and mutters, "Come with me."

Lena scoffs. "Why?"

Andrea barely spends a glance over her shoulder before answering.

"Because I'm your fucking House Mother."

Lena is livid.  
  


Campbell House is gorgeous.

Well, every house she passed by very much looks identical to each other. The renaissance-looking architecture pleasing her eyes more than she imagined it would. Lena was always a fan of practical structures. She never understood what was so special about old designs. She is faithful to the notion of progress, technology and modern art. Still, there was something about the sight of Campbell House, the lake being so close... it made her feel comfortable.

Andrea opened the main door and Lena let out a staggering breath. She realized there were only a couple of girls in the back of the living room – both with sleepy faces, drinking tea. Noticing the change in Lena's body, Andrea breaks the silence:

"Usually we receive new students on Sundays. We have this welcoming ritual-" Lena wrinkles her nose, in distaste. "yeah, I know you'd hate it. You are lucky you only got here today."

It wasn't luck. Lena imagined this sort of thing could happen. Knowing all the myths of studying in a boarding school with such a strong culture. So, she kindly asked Lillian to change the date of her plane ticket. The less attention she gets, the better.

She follows Andrea until the last floor. Through the hallway, she senses the smell of coffee, toothpaste and strawberry hair cream. They get to the last door and Andrea opens it for her, dramatically gesturing for her to go in.

"Ma'am." Lena rolls her eyes.

There's only one bed — no roommates. She's a senior, so solo dormitory privileges. There's a writing desk, a bookshelf, and a closet. The dark wooden floor contrasts with the soft whiteish paper walls and Lena thinks she doesn't hate it. She notices the Wycombe Abbey uniform folded in her bed. A black suit, a white button-up, a plaid skirt and a dark blue tie.

"You also have the option of wearing black pants instead of the skirt." Andrea adds, seeing her study the clothing. The girl sighs and leans her body in the door, her hand on the doorknob. Lena pays attention to her.

Andrea Rojas. The girl that once she thought she was in love with. It was a childish idea of romance, of course. She was sixteen years old, desperately needing a distraction from her brother's trial — but Andrea liked her. In the worst period of her life. She was sharp and witty in a way Lena knew how to deal with.

They fought, all the time. They would point each other's flaws like they were throwing daggers and in a span of minutes, they would be kissing it better. Their breakup was ugly.

The silence seems to stretch for several seconds.

"You are in for a rough time here." Andrea makes the first move.

Great.

"Funny." Lena arches an eyebrow. "The headmistress said something similar."

Andrea's eyes perk at that, but she doesn't say anything.

"So it is anticipated for me to be despised by my last name. Delightful." Lena drops in her bed, right next to the cursed uniform.

She knew it was coming. But she barely spent an hour on school grounds and the woman in chief — and her freaking ex-girlfriend — both threw it in her face she was sure to be tormented for the rest of the year.

Andrea's hand fidgets on the doorknob and Lena knows she's holding something back.

"Why are you my House Mother?" She mumbles it out. The question takes Andrea by surprise. The girl fakes a cough and darts her eyes away to the window on the opposite wall.

Lena waits a moment. Andrea won't lie to her. She never did.

Andrea looks at her and Lena's chest tightens from the care she finds in the girl's eyes.

"No one else wanted to do it."

She feels this pressure on her throat, the feeling striking her all of sudden. Lena can feel the watery attempting to escape her eyes but she holds it back.

It's real. She imagined Sam drove her to her new purgatory. This is going to be hell.

Lena glances at Andrea again and she can't do this anymore.

"Can you leave? I know you need to explain me stuff but honestly, I couldn't care less-"

"There's still something I need to tell you." Andrea says. She takes no pity on her, leaves the door and closes it. Changes it for the desk and her eyes don't ever leave Lena's. She hates it.

"Do I need to deal with this right now? I just want to rest." She rubs her eyes. Her head is pounding.

"Yes." And she doesn't explain.

"Then fucking say it already, goddamnit-"

"Kara Danvers is here, too."

It starts raining again. The raindrops hitting Lena's window like fists in her stomach. The white noise of the rain fills the echo Andrea drops on her.

Kara Danvers.

Clark Kent's cousin.

If she expected the Luthor name to haunt her down in this place, the presence of a Kent – of his family – heightens her curse infinitely.

She hears Andrea's steps on the wooden floor and the noise of her door opening again. She looks up and Andrea stares at her in a mix of feelings Lena can't afford to unpack right now.

"And she's Mrs. Grant's favorite girl." And then leaves, like if she didn't just tell Lena her narrative has gone rotten. Like she isn't meant to parallel her brother – bitter, small and forever Clark's sidekick. Except that now, she won't even be a sidekick. She's going to be a nemesis.

An enemy to be taken down by Wycombe Abbey's golden girl.

* * *

Lena doesn't leave her room until her stomach is begging her to.

She changes into her uniform — decides on the skirt instead of the pants despite the cold weather. She takes a look at herself in the mirror, adjusting the dark blue tie around her neck and liking the way the black suit hugs her frame. The cotton is soft and expensive. It's elegant.

Andrea left her handwritten notes. Explaining her schedules along with a map of the school grounds. She grabs it, tucking away in her suit's internal pocket.

It's almost time for lunch now and Lena is dreading the fact she needs to face the entire student body. She can't stand to stare at her reflection any longer and decides to treat it like a band-aid. She flees the room and walks fast to where the map told her to go. 

Looking down all the way, she can see only her feet moving on the pavement. The sound of her shoes scraping against the cement, protecting her from any voice that could reach her ears. She approaches the building and lifts her chin up. Not wanting to bump into someone but also not wanting to look intimidated. These people could break her if they tried — she wouldn't ever let them known, though.

Soon, she's at the cafeteria. The cacophony is pleasant, making her feel protected and invisible among the crowd. She inhales once, twice– and doesn't stop until she reaches the plates. So far, so good. Lena gets through half of her meal unnoticed. The bangers and mash tasting so good. She doesn't mind the unfortunate detail she's sitting alone in a sea of eight-hundred girls.

"May I?" A voice asks — and doesn't wait for an answer — because a girl plops in the sit in front of her.

Lena eyes her, warily. The first thing she notices is the short hair, a military cut — and then, the red tie and the sharp jawline. 

"So..." The girl begins between mouthfuls. "Lena Luthor, right?"

The moment arrived.

Lena's only arches an eyebrow, knowing the girl wasn't in need of confirmation. She seems to find Lena's silence amusing because she smirks and continues:

"I'm Kate. Kate Kane." The name does ring a bell to Lena, but she can't place it. Kate looks at the empty bench beside Lena as if she was expecting someone to be there. "Where is your House Mother?"

"She left me instructions, and that was all." She decides to engage in whatever this is. "Most people won't touch a Luthor with a ten-foot pole." Lena doesn't mention the fact Andrea is the person that most touched her in her life, probably.

Kate laughs.

"Disappointing." She goes back to focusing on her meal.

Lena studies the girl once more. Notices the way some girls are side-eyeing their interaction.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Talking to me." It wins back Kate's attention to her.

"I didn't know to talk to you was a crime."

"Crime," Lena laughs dryly. "was what my brother did." She anchors Kate with a look and asks her again, this time making it clear it's the last time. "Why are you talking to me?"

Kate smirks and Lena is shocked by how devilishly it looks.

"I want to annoy Kara."

Lena's lungs stop working.

"Chill." Kate says. "She's on the opposite side of the cafeteria, but the gossip will definitely reach her by the end of the lunch."

Her nerves seem to settle a bit knowing she won't be facing Kara at any second now. Lena sees red, her skin heating with the stress.

"Fuck off." Kate's eyebrows jump in surprise. "I just arrived here. I want to have fucking lunch in peace."

"I'm not your enemy." Kate frowns. "You were sitting by yourself and I thought saying hi would be nice. Annoying Kara is an extra."

Lena measures the pros and cons of asking why knowing Kate was being friendly to her would irritate Kara this much. She had an idea but why would it be worth to the point of being seen smiling with the murderer-wannabe's sister? Does she really wanna know?

Before she decides, a hand claps at her shoulder.

"Fuck off, Kane." It's Andrea.

Lena sighs. It's only getting worse.

Kate's face lights up, amused once more.

"So you _do_ have a friend here." She ignores the girl behind Lena.

A _friend_? Lena wishes she was dead.

"Kate." Andrea hisses. Every table close to them was explicitly staring at the crumbling conversation. It's the complete opposite of how Lena wanted this to be.

Kate puts her hands up, relenting. Her eyes drop to Lena's again.

"Welcome to Wycombe Abbey." She gets up and _winks_.

Kate leaves and Andrea takes her place.

"Fucking asshole." She lets it out under a breath. Her blue eyes search for Lena's. "Are you okay? What did she say to you?"

"Nothing." She doesn't want to talk about Kate mentioning Kara. She still hasn't processed the fact she's living this close to the other girl. "Great superhero entrance." She can't help but mock her ex's predictable behavior.

Andrea's lips become a thin line.

"Sorry." She says it, almost nonchalantly. "I didn't mean to drop that on you and leave-"

"Yeah, you did."

"Don't be hard." Andrea bites back. "I'm doing my best to take care of you. And I know by experience it's almost impossible to do that and not angering you in the process."

Lena's headache comes back stronger. She pinches her nose bridge trying to distract herself from the pain.

"I don't want this." She pushes her plate away, losing her appetite. She tried to have lunch and ended up engaging in gossip and discussing her dead relationship with an ex. Lena gets up. She ignores the girls turning their heads to watch her leave.

"Lena-" She hears Andrea try, but the girl gives up and Lena doesn't care.

* * *

No other tragedy happens for the rest of the day. She only has a couple of classes and they are introductory. She learns the school dates, where the library is and the best option in the coffee machine. In class, Lena only has to deal with the stares but no one tried anything. No teacher welcomed her even though she's a new student in the senior year. She stands out. Everybody is in sync with Wycombe's culture. Everybody has their own clan. Their best friends and inside jokes. They belong. And it's clear to Lena she wasn't invited to any of that. An intruder, at it's best. Lena didn't even ask for it. It was all her mother's desperation to reconstruct a sense of normality, of the status quo. It was for the sake of Luthor Corp's stocks and Lillian's vanity she got dragged out of her Westminster Academy and thrown into Wycombe Abbey.

The afternoon is ending and Lena goes back to Campbell House. She signs her name in the Headmistress House's attendance book, hearing the sound of laughter coming from the living room. There are girls chatting by the fireplace and soft music playing in the background. A couple of girls spare a few glances at her but she ignores it, hurrying up to her room.

She gets rid of the tie and the suit, hanging it on the chair by the writing desk. She kicks off her shoes and stays only with her white button-up and skirt.

Lena dissolves in her bed, wanting nothing more to forget the entire day. She wonders if it's going to be like this for the rest of the year. 365 days of nothing but hollowness and harsh glances. Lena thinks about Sam, promising to drive forty minutes every time she calls, just to pick her up at Wycombe and drags her away to somewhere softer. She imagines she can barely make it until Sunday without calling her and begging her to take her away. What she wouldn't give to go to Jack's house and get straight-up drunk in his father's whiskey. And then pass out in Sam's shoulder. That's what she wants to come back to.

She can't. At least not right now. But she can text, and the idea of exchanging at least a few words with her best friend already makes her feel better.

_Lena Luthor, 18:15: Andrea is studying here. Did you know?_

Lena smirks, knowing how Sam's reaction would be. The response is immediate.

_Sam Arias, 18:15: What the fuck_

_Sam Arias, 18:16:_ _No, I didn't. Did she talk to you?_

_Lena Luthor, 18:16:_ _Yeah. She's my House Mother._

_Sam Arias, 18:16: Am I supposed to know what it means?_

She is thinking about how to explain what a House Mother is and her phone receives another message.

_Sam Arias, 18:17: You... You are not getting back together, are you?_

Lena rolls her eyes.

_Lena Luthor, 18:17:_ _Are you serious?_

_Sam Arias, 18:17_ : _You guys broke up like... several times in a year. Don't blame me for asking._

That was true. But it was over. Her cycle with Andrea lasted longer than it should, and was harder to break than Lena previously thought — but she was clean of it. Free. Lena's fingers fidget above her phone's screen worrying about what to say next.

_Lena Luthor, 18:19: Someone else is studying here, too..._

It's what she settles for.

And Lena reads Sam's " _whomst_?" when she hears a knock on the door. She sighs, putting her phone aside and getting up. The last thing Lena wants right now is to deal with Andrea again.

She opens the door and it's like– a zoom just went _right_ by her ears. Suddenly she can't hear anything but the sound of heart pounding against her chest.

It's not Andrea.

Standing there – like it was _nothing_ , like it isn't the last place she should be – is Kara Danvers.

Long and wavy blond hair is in a neat ponytail, leaving Kara's face open to stare at. Blue eyes looking at her with such peaceful but drumming energy that Lena almost forgets the war happening between their names. She's dressed in black slacks and a black sweater. The yellow tie — from Rubens House, she learned — standing out.

They gaze at each other. Drinking in each other's image. Lena almost laughs at the thought of how betrayed the student body would feel by missing this collision. Lex Luthor sister's and Clark Kent's cousin. Kara's eyes study her face tirelessly. It feels like ages passed when they hear a silent thud at the end of the hallway. It whips their attention off each other, and they find a wide-eyed girl looking at them.

"Oh." She lifts up a finger as if calculating something. Maybe trying to understand why Kara Danvers would be standing by Lena Luthor's door of all places.

Kara turns her attention back to her, with a little smile in her face and Lena's skin tingles.

"Can I come in?" She asks, but before Lena could plain out say _no_ , Kara steps into her room. She throws one more ugly glance at the girl by the stairs and closes the door. She must be probably thinking Kara's life is in danger. Having to deal with Campus Police before going to sleep isn't what she planned. Nice.

Lena spins to find Kara studying her room instead of looking at her. Kara's hands are in her pockets and there are a few hair strands escaping the ponytail, falling close to her cheek.

Lena is uncomfortable, tired and profoundly aching by the sight of this girl in front of her.

"What are you doing here?" She breathes.

Then Kara is gazing at her again. She sighs and the look she sends Lena it's like she's afraid of breaking the girl by saying whatever she wants to say.

She does exactly that.

"I missed you.”


	2. chapter I — cut me deep, send me home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey gays, i got really surprised with the feedback. i couldn't imagine in a million years my prologue would hit 130 kudos. it might seem like it's not much, even more for a popular ship like supercorp, but it meant the world to me. thank you!
> 
> i didn’t posted this chapter when i told y’all i was going to, i'll tell you everything about it in the end notes.
> 
> but, first about this chapter:
> 
> 1\. i don't like it. it's pretty much just exposition, which i hate, i tried to make it less introductory but i couldn't warm up to it. just hope you don't hate it as much as i do. 
> 
> 2\. there are flashbacks. pay attention to the timeline, babes.
> 
> 3\. this fanfic is basically kara and lena quoting classics to each other. i'm so sorry.

_You've got my devotion_  
_But man, I can hate you sometimes._

"You're rearranging deck chairs on the titanic, my brother." Lena says, watching her brother struggle with the chess pieces between them.

They've been playing for two hours now. It's a tie and they both hate losing. More specifically, the Luthor children hate not winning—so the tie is not acceptable. Lex smiles, his eyes sparkling with the challenge and the love he feels for his little sister.

If there was anything Lex Luthor was proud of in his life, it's the person Lena is turning to be. Of the person she already is, in any case. He loved noticing every progress in Lena's heart and mind. When she arrived at Luthor Mansion with only a teddy bear and a dead mother, she was nothing but timid and insecure. Eight years later, she became a force of her own. She would stand up to their mother in a way Lex was never capable of, she would learn and adapt faster than he ever could. The sad thing, though, is that Lena would burn faster and bruise easier. She was becoming sad awfully young and there was nothing he could do about it. It was her weakness, anyway.

Lex loved her. Love is something Luthors _can_ do. But pity? Luthors don't pity each other, never.

"I'm God." Lex says, smirking. He knows his narcissism annoys the hell out of Lena. "I sank the Titanic, myself." He moves the chess pieces, knowing very well Lena would see right through his tactics. She was just too good at this.

Lena smiled at him. Moments like this are the ones that would make her stop thinking about fleeing the Luthor Mansion. To never deal with Lillian again. If she is being honest, the fact it was heavily snowing would also make her think twice about leaving. The fireplace was keeping they both warm, and Lex was finally spending time at home. She thrived in the presence of her older brother. Since she was adopted by the Luthors, Lex was the only one that could actually make her feel like family. He always went to Lena's school events, insisted on supporting her in whatever project she was in. Whatever role Lillian was supposed to do—there was Lex. He would always encourage and challenge her through anything. Lena should be appreciative of him.

However, Luthors never pity at each other.

"And what is a God to a non-believer?" She sings while moving her piece. "Checkmate."

"I certainly taught you to be dramatic." Lex muttered out, and then more firmly, " _Potes meos suaviari clones_."

Lena laughed at her brother's incapacity of losing. " _Podex perfectus es_."

Lex was unwillingly setting the chessboard again for another match when they hear footsteps rushing through the mansion's wooden floor.

"Lex!" The voice sings. Lex jumps from his seat, surprised but pleased at the presence of the new intruder.

"It's Kent!" Lex says as the door opens, and a Clark Kent pops up smiling.

"Told you I'd find time to meet you here!" Clark greets and gives Lex a bear hug, almost making Lex's feet leave the ground. Lena rolls her eyes.

There goes her time with Lex. She was no competition for Clark Kent. The strong, tanned skin and all-white teeth Clark Kent. Lex probably loved this boy more than he loved Lillian and Lionel together. Lena liked to think that Clark would only lose to her. Maybe.

"Hey, Lena!" Clark walks to her after putting Lex down. He waves his curls out of his eyes. Lena stands up and gives the boy a brief hug.

"Nice to see you, Clark. Wasn't expecting you to visit in the middle of this snowstorm?" She says, feels Lex glaring at her.

"Uh, it was a little bit rough—but we got here okay. I promised Lex I would surprise him." Clark sends Lex a look. "He thinks I'm not able to leave the ranch for long."

"You are a farm boy." There's a little bit of despise in his voice, but Lex holds it back because he loves Clark. "You are attached to that place."

Lena, though, focuses on an entirely different thing.

"Wait– did you said we?" God, she hates visitors. She can deal with Clark Kent, she is used to it. But if his entire family was in their living room right now...

"Oh, yeah," Clark says as if remembering something. He turns to Lex. "Kara had to come with me. Mom and Dad are traveling, and the Ranch is in the hands of contractors. It didn't feel right leaving her alone with them."

"Nah, no problem." Lex waves his hand. "I didn't know Kara was staying with you."

"Yeah, Jeremiah and Eliza are working on something big—they're super busy. So, they didn't want to leave Kara to spend her winter break days in their house with no company."

"And who is Kara, exactly?" Lena says, cutting them off of their world. She's a little bit territorial, and there's a stranger at her house. Where she was supposed to be rejoicing her time in peace away from Lillian.

"My cousin." Clark throws an arm around Lex's shoulders.

"She's great." Lex says. "She hates me, though. Probably going to hate you too." He gestures to Lena. She arches an eyebrow at that.

"She doesn't hate you–"

"Yeah, Clark, she does." Lex grabs at his shoulder and starts to drag him out of the room. "C'mon, lemme show you the new hunting guns I got."

Lena rolls her eyes.

Good. She could barely stand that much of men cologne any longer.  
  


Winter has always been pleasant for Lena. She would be at home, there would be no Luthor Corp events. No parties happening at her garden—Lillian wouldn't be up in her ass demanding anything. Sometimes, Lex would stop by. She enjoyed being alone at the Luthor Mansion, with anyone but the staff. They are kinder and always more interesting than Lillian's friends and associates. This time, it seems the mansion is crowded. Lena was happy at the idea of spending time alone with her brother. She didn't even invite her new friend in Westminster's technology Club, Sam Arias, to come over. Lex clearly didn't have the same thought process.

She could hear Lex and Clark playing outside, the shots cutting the quiet noise of the fireplace. Trying to read her copy of _Othello_ was getting more pointless with each bullet the boys fired.

Lena was considering giving up on her book when the door opened and a blonde girl she never saw before was standing at the doorway. Wearing a blue-colored turtleneck and black jeans, the girl stumbled when realizing she opened the wrong door.

"Oh, sorry." She breathed, adjusting her glasses. "I'm looking for the bathroom–uh, it's huge around here." She grabbed the doorknob, ready to shut the door.

"There's one here." Lena gestured to the back of the room. This girl is Clark's cousin.

"Do you mind?" Kara motions her hand in the bathroom's direction.

"Go ahead."

She crosses the room like she was stepping into a minefield.

Lena stands up, walking towards the window. She watches Lex and Clark still playing with targets in the middle of the snow and can't help but be a little bit angry. She wonders if Kara wasn't as upset as her—perhaps even more, for being thrown into a house which she didn't know anyone, and her cousin not worrying the slightest about it. The vacations she envisioned were pretty different—it involved building robots with Lex and debating over crime documentaries with him. Talking shit about their mother would be a great way to spend time, too.

Clark lets out a loud laugh and Lena's face shrinks in distaste.

"O, beware, my lord, of jealousy; it is the green-eyed monster, which doth mock the meat it feeds on..."

She turns to find Kara standing in the middle of the room, staring at her with a little smile on her lips. She must have been deep in her angsty trip, she didn't hear the girl getting closer.

Lena looks at her, bewildered. Kara must find it amusing because she chuckles and points to the book in her hands.

"It's a quote... from Othello." Lena follows her gaze to the old agglomerate of pages.

It's when Clark and Lex go into another round of happy laughs she understands what Kara meant.

She was making fun of her.

Lena side-eyes the girl, arching an eyebrow.

"Kara, isn't it? How do you find spending your winter break at Luthor Mansion?" She asks, once she realizes the girl wasn't going to leave.

"I like it quite a lot." Kara keeps smiling. "It's way better than the Kent Ranch if anything." That surprises Lena. So she wasn't as upset as her. "You, on the other hand, doesn't seem to be enjoying our presence here."

This girl isn't afraid of contesting her, unlike Clark—always so sympathetic and friendly.

"Well, you pointed it out already. I'm not fond of the idea of sharing Lex right now." Lena refers to Othello's quote. "Don't you care Clark isn't going to pay any attention to you for the whole time he is here? Because he won't, you know."

Kara chuckles, bitterly, and drops to the armchair behind her.

"I'm glad I don't have to be alone with him." She's not sad as she says it, but she isn't happy either—Lena notices. Kara plays with her fingers and her foot starts tapping on the ground.

"You don't have a good relationship with him?" It's more of a question than a conclusion. The perfect Clark Kent isn't cherished by his little cousin?

"It's... complicated."

Lena is curious and wants to ask more but Kara's hands keep fidgeting. She decides to change the subject.

"What have you been doing all afternoon?" She didn't meet the girl when she arrived.

"Taking a nap in the room your butler gave me. I left when I got hungry, but couldn't find the kitchen." She mumbles out. "And then I couldn't find my way back to my room when I really needed to go to the bathroom."

Lena snorts at girl's drama.

"Please, it's not like the Kent Ranch isn't as big as this mansion."

"Maybe." Kara concedes. "But it is definitely bigger than my house in Midvale."

Frowning, Lena asks, "I thought you lived in Smallville as well."

Kara shakes her head. Wow. It means she traveled to Smallville to spent time with her cousin's family, but they left. And then her cousin drove her to his best friend's house. Essentially, Kara was being dragged around while she was supposed to be enjoying her winter break. Lena knows a little about the feeling of being dragged around—a few business trips around Ireland while desperately holding on her mother's hand. From sleeping alone at hotels to a couple of nights in the hands of cops and nurses. Waiting for her father to show up and say that her mother wasn't dead. But all it took was a flight all the way across the world to her new family, and she was being dragged around all over again.

Except Lillian would never offer her a hand to hold.

"It doesn't seem like a lot of fun—all these different places. I bet you wanna go home." Lena says, her voice lowering to the point of softening. It caught her off guard.

Kara eyes her as if searching for something.

"I feel like I should be going back to Midvale, yes." But her voice sounds thick, a hard contrast for the silvery tone she first used to quote Othello.

"I think you should stay." Lena says, and she doesn't know why. "This house may surprise you."

"Perhaps..." Kara finally seems comfortable.

"I'm Lena." She feels a little stupid.

Kara smiles and Lena notices kind blue eyes for the first time.

"I know."  
  


Lena tries to find Kara some food only to discover that, despite the fact that the Luthors are one of the wealthiest families in the United Kingdom, their fridge was empty. For Kara's horror.

"It's not empty." She tries to comfort the girl. "We can cook."

Lena hears a thump and it sounds a lot like Kara's head bumped into cold marble. She turns around to find her collapsed against the kitchen island.

"Can't we order? I mean it's a faster way to get food and we don't need to start a firestorm." Kara talks with her face squashed against the counter. Lena ignores her.

"I'm a bad cook. It will end up in a firestorm unless you do all the job."

"No way I'm cooking for you." Lena holds the urge to slap the back of the girl's head. I mean, it is exposed. Kara is practically asking for it.

"So we order?"

"We never order, we live far away from the town." Kara whines. Lena starts to open the cabinets, and pauses only to give Kara a shove. "Start moving. We'll make pizza."

"Isn't pizza, like, hard to make?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"It's not rocket science!"

"Aren't you a millionaire? Why don't you have people to cook for you?"

"It's just a couple of hours making pizza. You can't be that spoiled."

Kara raises both hands, surrendering. "It's a valid question."

She walks to stand in front of Lena. On the exact opposite side of the kitchen counter, eyeing the ingredients Lena was giving her. She could do this.

"We are on minimal staff. It's something we do—when it's mostly Lex and me here. We like to have the house for us. They all come back once Lillian arrives, but at least they had a break."

"A break from labor or a break from Luthors?" Kara pokes. Lena takes a breath.

"Kind of the same thing, isn't it?" She considers throwing the wheat sack on the girl's face. "Lex did mention your distaste for Luthors."

Kara stops at that. Lena doesn't know if she is confused about what to do with the tomatoes in front of her or if she's reacting to what she said.

She grabs a knife and starts working.

"So Lex knows I don't stand his ass?" She says, after savoring the information.

"Yeah, he also said you'd probably hate me too."

"Not you." Kara stares at her and Lena notices she was holding back a smile. "Not you. You're feeding me."

"I have no choice since I'm stuck with you."

"It's a big house, you could ignore me if you wanted."

"Not if you starve and I'm left to deal with your corpse."

Lena doesn't mention how curious she is to know more about the girl.

"Okay." Kara breathes before adjusting her glasses up in her nose. "Escalated quickly."

They take their time preparing the pizza dough. At some point, Kara pulls out her phone and _I Fought The Law_ by The Bobby Fuller Four starts playing. Lena appreciates the quiet but she also likes the way Kara is humming the song while making the sauce. They exchange ordinary information about each other—Kara tells her she goes to Midvale High and about her love for classic literature. Lena tells Kara how she hates her fancy school and about her love for bioengineering.

"Bioengineering?" Kara repeats, in awe. "That sounds complicated."

"In a sense." Lena agrees. She's advanced, but she just started high school—so it's not like she's a scientist already, anyway. "I think I'm in love with the idea of creating something that can surpass anything humans can ever be, you know? Shaping the future of a whole civilization, philosophizing on the nature and difference between humans and machines... I like the challenge."

Lena doesn't remember talking so much in the last eight years of her life. Not with anyone that wasn't her brother. And Kara listens. It's not like how Lex listens—searching for something wrong, something to correct, something to prove he is smarter. It's not like Lionel listens—dismissive, offended by how a 13-year-old is wiser than him and haunted by how much she sounds like her mother. It's not like how Lillian doesn't listen at all.

The way she does it, the way Kara listens, it's more eloquent than the words she seems to worship.

"You're more of a romantic than a scientist, then."

_See_?

They stare at each other and Lena wants to tell her she's right.

Before she thinks of something to say, Lex and Clark come barging in through the back door. Both of them flushed by the cold wind and with snow dirty boots. They notice the two girls—Clark frowns while Lex smirks.

"Cooking, uh?"

"You ate all the leftovers yesterday, Lex." Lena explains.

"That I did." He removes his coat and pats Clark in the shoulders. "Come on, we're joining them." 

Kara and Clark both sigh in unison. They don't know how to exist around each other. It doesn't escape Lena.

But it does seem to escape Lex, who was now happily organizing the toppings.

The moon was high in the sky when the pizza was ready. They settled for the coffee table by the fireplace instead of the dining room. It would drive Lillian mad if she ever knew they ate homemade pizza anywhere near her couch. Kara's phone goes silent when Lex puts _Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)_ on the record player.

"I'm an athlete, I shouldn't be eating this." Clark uttered under the music.

Lena hates him. What a bore.

"Shut your mouth." Lex says. "I'm on the same team as you. No one cares." He chews a huge bite as if to make a point.

Kara looks pleased.

What happens is unexpected: they have fun together, the four of them. Clark gives up the golden boy act when Lex pulls him to the dark side, and they won at Monopoly twice. It's when they switch to Clue that Lex's glory is destroyed.

"Lex's the murderer."

" _What the fuck._ " Lex gasps. "That's not possible. You have X-ray vision and is somehow reading my cards." He points accusingly to the girl sitting on his opposite side.

Kara raises her hands in victory once again that night.

"I'm just that good." She brags, and Lena doesn't find that annoying.

"I don't wanna play anymore."

Lena and Clark roll their eyes. Kara misses it because blue eyes were pinned at pale skin and dark hair. Lex gets up and offers the other boy a hand.

"We are calling it a night." Lex says and Clark smiles. Lex kisses the top of Lena's head goodnight and they leave.

The feeling of it all somewhat overwhelms Lena. She never had domestic crowded nights like this, if you consider three people a crowd. A night full of life, bickering and full stomachs. Where they were safe from the winter near the fire and Frank Sinatra was singing to them. Suddenly, she's sad Kara and Clark are not staying for long. She enjoyed cooking with the girl. Relished watching Clark struggle to keep up with Lex's wit and Kara's fire. Lena is addicted to this blooming feeling in her chest, that feels like a balloon full of hot air ready to explode.

When she turns her attention to Kara again, the girl is already staring at her. And there's something–there's something Lena wants, but she doesn't know what it is.

Maybe it's to be her best friend.

She has best friends, though. She has Lex and Sam. And Sam is new and brilliant—but it's not the same.

Kara is watching her—and there's a word. But Lena can't think it.

"Wanna turn off the lights and watch Frankenstein?"

It's what she settles for.

Kara laughs and it almost blinds Lena.

"I was waiting for you to ask this, bioengineer."

* * *

**ONE YEAR LATER.**

"You, my creator, abhor me."

Lena hears Kara say almost one year later, when Lena finally finds the word.

She doesn't say it to Kara, though.

The first one to hear it is Lionel.

The wind was freezing her bones. Sitting in the middle of an empty church, soaking wet, Lena felt the crucifix staring right back at her.

_You, my creator, abhor me._

It's what the Creature says to Victor Frankenstein. There's some strength in her to let out a weak laugh. God. _God._ The irony. She feels Kara standing behind where she's seated, and Lena knows she has all the time in the world.

It was still raining, and she never met a cold summer like this before.

She came out as a lesbian to her father. The only one she had and the one that was supposed to love her.

He didn't. Our creator doesn't approve it, he said.

"I ought to be thy Adam, but I am rather the fallen angel." Lena quotes back.

Kara puts a hand in her shoulder and Lena moves to rest her own above it.

Feet running through flooded streets are heard, and they turn to see a breathless Lex entering the church.

"Thank God." He says in a throaty voice. Lex is just as soaked as Lena.

He kneels in front of her, spending a quick glance at the Christ observing them before gazing into green eyes.

"You don't need him." Lena doesn't know who is he referring to. "You'll be alright."

Kara's fingers tighten around hers.

She believes him.   
  


* * *

**PRESENT DAY.**

"I missed you."

There is something bursting in Lena's chest and she feels like she is suffocating. It burns, and burns and Kara is—Kara is gazing at her and Lena doesn't know what to do with her hands. She wants to hug Kara, wants to push her out of the room, wants to rip her chest open and stop whatever is happening there.

"It doesn't change anything." Lena manages to get out.

It truly didn't.

Kara swallows and a vein stretches in her neck. She's so, so taut. Lena can see her hands closing in fists, even through her pockets.

"I was doing fine."

It catches Lena by surprise. She was waiting for something cruel.

"What..."

"I was doing fine, you know, before meeting you in that winter."

Lena feels the punch. She also loses the point.

"You came to _my_ house." Lena whispers harshly. Kara is trying, and that wasn't what she meant. Lena knows.

But she rejects it.

"Why you asked me to stay, then?" Kara says, voice thick with emotion.

"I wanted to know you." Lena almost _spits_ , as if admitting that was like tasting salt.

Kara sighs.

"I wanted far more."

The world stops, for half a second.

This dance is a little bit rusty, after two years. But it's their broken record. A moment they've been reliving what feels like forever.

And her next move, Lena knows by heart.

"Leave."

Kara falters.

"Lena..."

She tries to stop her eyes from watering.

"Fine–" She moves, grabbing her phone and spins, her hand in the doorknob. "–I leave."

"I can't believe–" Kara never believes Lena will run away again. But she always does.

Lena bumps into another girl in the hallway, it's not the same one that saw Kara arriving.

"HEY!" The girl calls and Kara is at the door now. Lena keeps walking, knowing Kara will follow. "Pay attention to the curfew!"

She gets to the living room and everyone stops to look at her. Kara's hand grabs her elbow.

"Stop it." Kara's breath meets her ear.

Their skins don't meet, but it's the first time in a long while that they touch each other. Lena can feel her atoms trying to fight the fabric, crawling towards Kara's fingerprints.

There's a dozen of girls watching them, most likely hoping for a fistfight. It makes Kara take a step back and Lena accepts the opportunity to escape. She leaves Campbell House sprinting and barely manages to type a message before reaching Wycombe's gates.

_Lena Luthor, 18:43: Come pick me up._

Somewhere in Bayswater, Sam jolts up from her bed with no hesitation.   
  


The Barnacle is one of her favorite places. It's so close to Westminster Academy she used to hang around almost every day after class, with a cup of coffee in her hands and Sam's arm around her shoulder. They would comment on whatever art performance was going on while waiting for Jack to show up—he'd always be late, anyway. There would be always something happening there. Right now, Lena is grateful it isn't packed. They find a table by the window and Sam orders hot chocolates for them. It's not necessary anymore, after stealing Sam's coat she's much warmer. Lena holds her own hands while Sam is quiet—and she lets her be.

"Kara Danvers." Sam whistles and Lena wishes she didn't. Sam chuckles almost bitterly. "Yeah, of course."

Lena scans her. She was wearing the Westminster's black and green sweater and pajama pants. The tanned skin always matching The Barnacle's lights. Her hair seemed a little rumpled but that Lena knows it was from worrying over her.

"Did you know she was attending Wycombe?"

"No." Sam answers, simply. "If I knew I wouldn't have offered to drop you _there_."

It wouldn't have made a difference. Lillian threw her with no life-vests. Lena would have to keep herself floating regardless. She doesn't say that to Sam, though.

"But I knew in the back of my mind she was going to show up again, at some point."

"And how the hell did you know that?" She can't help but be annoyed. Sam likes to be cryptic sometimes, and she has no patience for that. Never did before, and especially not now.

"She never let you go willingly." Sam says, suddenly whispering. Lena feels her jaw tensing. "I always had the impression that something was ripped out when it wasn't meant to be. At least not in the middle of that ugliness."

Lena has no answers for that, and she's not in the mood to look for them. Thankfully, the waitress arrives and Lena focuses on the heat and sweet coming from the mug.

Sam looks at her watch and sighs. "We don't have long. A few more minutes and I have to drive you back."

"No." She answers, closing her eyes and smelling cinnamon along with cocoa.

"Lena–" She breathes. "–it's your first day, okay? Hold on a little bit. You'll get the hang of it, of being around Kara, by the end of the week."

"No, Sam." Lena puts the mug down. "I really don't care. Everyone will be staring and it'll be the first thing I'll have to deal with in the morning. Just– _please_ , let me stay with you tonight."

Sam softens.

"Okay, but I'll drive you back tomorrow."

"You have your classes."

"If you don't care about a reprimand, then I don't do too. We'll both skip classes."

"Sam–"

"It's that or I'll drive you back right now."

Lena shuts up.  
  


She wakes up feeling soft hands in her hair.

"That's no way of showing you were desperate to see me, love."

Lena opened her eyes so quickly, it almost felt like she would fell if she wasn't laying down. Smiling down at her was the third heart of the Westminster's Bastards, Jack Speer. She threw her arms around him, hugging him so hard she almost bit her tongue.

"Wow, you _miss_ me. Things must be pretty bad at Wycombe." Jack says, laughing softly. It vibrates into Lena's heart and she realizes how bad she missed his warmth.

"Shut up." Lena lets him go, but just so she could take a look at his face. Jack is staring at her with such care she already believes in better things for this day. He probably knows what happened and why she is here Thursday morning out of sudden. Jack wouldn't take the risk of being caught tip-toeing into the girl's dorm in broad daylight for nothing less, even if he was a master at it by now.

Jack's smile weakens a bit when he asks, "how are you feeling?"

"Great." She wets her mouth, realizing how much she needs water. Jack looks pointedly at her. "I'm serious... I feel amazing." Lena rubs her hands over her face, trying to shake the sleep off but also trying to avoid the stares coming from Jack and Sam, the last still silent near the dorm's window.

"Well, I'm delighted to see you. Smudged make-up and all that." Jack gestures to her face and Lena grunts. She hates when Jack is being excessively British in the morning.

Jack stands up, smoothing his green sweater. After almost two months without seeing him in person, Lena tries to pay attention to details—his brown skin is glowing in the morning light, which allows Lena to realize there's a hint of beard starting to grow in his face.

"I can't stay for long." Jack says, his eyes shine as he looks at Lena. He is more alert when turning back to Sam. "And you two can't, either."

"I know." Sam sighs.

It lands with a pang in Lena's chest, conscious of the trouble she got her best friend into. Not mentioning making her drive at night while worrying over her. She misses the chance to dwell in self-pity when Sam offers her a glass of water. Lena didn't even have to ask. Sam will always be there when she needs and won't ever allow her to apologize for it.

"Will you forgive me for running, love? I came because I wanted to give you a hug. If Mrs. Jackson catches me here _again_ I'm screwed."

Lena nods sadly. Jack gives her a quick kiss on the cheek and waves to Sam before leaving.

"We have until eight o'clock to get you to Wycombe if you don't want to be in _too_ much trouble." She says as she walks around the room collecting their clothes.

"At this point, I don't hope for anything." Lena replies, not liking how _serious_ Sam is sounding. She knows the girl was worried, but something was off. Lena wanted to ask, but she doesn't know if she has the mind for it. Not right now. Sam, even all loyal and sincere, had her moments of evasiveness and brooding. Lena would allow her to have it. For now.

The car ride back to Wycombe Abbey is quiet. With the windows open, all they hear is the sound of the wind and the cars passing by. Sam barely slept. Lena almost offered to take an Uber but she knew Sam would be offended even at the idea of that. There's no conversation. Lena is trying to respect Sam's mood and Sam knows better than to try and console Lena again for what happened yesterday. She freaked out _once_ , now she'll deal with it.

Friendship is knowing the sound in silence, too.

They say goodbye with a hug and Lena tries to linger in the other girl's heat. Sam whispers a "remember to call me _first_ " in a tone Lena doesn't quite understand. It's not like she has anyone to call, anyway. It's not like she would call anyone else. She walks hastily towards Campbell House, knowing she already lost her first class. She's surprised no one was expecting to collect her at the gates, but she's not playing with her luck. She'll take whatever fate makes her get into her classes unnoticed. Just a couple of girls wandering through the lawns spend a few glances towards her but Lena is relieved. She's not thrilled to find out how the school received last night's events. She isn't fooling herself, she knows pretty well the gossip would be everywhere by now.

_A Luthor and a Danvers collide._

She rolls her eyes before entering the House. She has one foot in the first step of the stairs when she hears,

"Lena Luthor."

The voice is anything, but friendly.

She turns to find a girl walking in her direction. Black skin, voluminous and curly black hair. Wearing Wycombe's uniform more impeccably than she ever saw a girl wearing it by now. Lena recognizes her as the girl she bumped while fleeing yesterday.

"I bumped into you yesterday." She mumbles, kinda pathetically. "I'm so-"

"Listen." The girl says in such an elevated voice Lena is now unwinking. "My name is Iris West. I'm Campbell House's head girl. What you did yesterday was _unacceptable_."

"I–" Lena tries.

"You left without assigning the attendance book. You came back in the following day _almost_ _late_ for your second class. You left no information of your localization past curfew, and you're still a minor." Iris pauses and Lena feels like she's a little ant the girl could step on easily. "Normally, this would take you directly to Headmistress Grant. It'd cost you a call to your parents and a notification for three months where your _liberties_ would be limited."

"I know what I did I was wrong, but-" Lena stop, realizing what Iris said. "Wait– what do you mean by normally?" The girl lets out a breath, slowly. Then she takes a step, getting into Lena's personal space. She's pretty intimidated by that, actually. Iris whispers as if she's telling Lena a secret.

"I'm well aware of your... situation here." It's what escapes her mouth but her expression could translate as _I know all about your fucking drama._ "A friend asked me to go easy on you, _just this time._ You see, I'm not tolerating this kind of behavior any longer. Thousand of girls dream of studying here, but they can't afford it. Brilliant minds, even with scholarships, can't make it here sometimes."

"Look-" Lena doesn't know what she was going to say. She has the urge to take a step back.

"I don't care if you never intended to be here. I don't care if you _hate_ Wycombe Abbey. You'll honor it. And you _will not_ get in the way of Campbell House's performance this year. Are we clear?"

"Yes." Lena answers in a tiny voice. She was pretty much getting her ass handed to her. And she's no girl to take shit from anyone, but knows she pretty much deserves it. Even more when she's not being punished when she should. "I– I appreciate your understanding." Iris looks pointedly at her, her mind flashes to Jack looking at her the same way an hour ago. " _This time_."

"That's it." Iris smiles. "Now, please, go take a bath and change before you miss your second class as well."

"Yeah." Lena clears her throat. "Thank you, really." She says again, while turning towards the stairs. She sees Iris's eyes soften for a second before nodding her to hurry up.

Lena obeys.  
  
  


Iris's words hit Lena strong enough to make her go straight to the library after class. She tries to catch up with the content she missed in the last two days. She can't forget her sense of self just because Lillian would like her to. She's mentally exhausted after the mess these last twenty-four hours were, but she forces herself to keep studying. Lena remembers she has a goal, a dream, even if everything got blurry in the last two years. She has to make something of herself so she can escape her family, her past and even her own mind.

She pinches her nose bridge when a headache starts to show it's face. But she still has two subjects to go — so Lena cracks her knuckles and turns a page.

The library is pretty much empty. It's too early in the semester and no one is desperate yet to be here so late. The Houses have classes together, which was the only thing that gave Lena a piece of mind. She only shared classes with two houses today: Wendover and Cloister. No classes with Rubens until Thursday – which means no Kara walking around. She tries to massage her own neck when the smell of coffee takes over her senses.

She doesn't need to wonder about the source. A cup appears right next to her textbook.

"Seems like you need it."

Lena turns to find Kate Kane dropping to the seat next to her. The girl gestures for her to take the cup.

"Thank you." Lena raises an eyebrow as she takes it, stopping for a moment to smell it before drinking.

"There's no poison in it." Kate jokes but Lena knows she says it purposely trying to break the ice. She smiles.

"I know. I like the smell of it, helps with my headaches." Kate frowns.

"Do you need anything?"

"Well, caffeine." Lena raises the cup. "You already provided." The girl smiles and her eyes starts to wander around the library.

Lena reads a few more phrases before a question pops into her mind.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

It's like Kate was waiting for her to ask that. She knows a girl like Lena would be vigilant at all times. A few moments go by before Kate offers an answer. One Lena wasn't expecting at all.

Kate whispers it, almost afraid of the words.

"I know how it is to lose a sibling to the dark side."

She tries to smile but it's weak. Lena lets out a staggering breath, trying not show how startled she got by the sentence. It doesn't work because Kate notices.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

Lena remembers why the girl seemed so familiar yesterday.

She is Kate _Kane_. Lena saw her in a couple of events Luthor Corp did in association with Wayne Industries. She was Bruce Wayne's younger cousin and her father was the head of a big private security company, The Crows. She knows because Luthor Corp hired them several times, the last time to protect _them_ during Lex's trial. She doesn't know the whole story. She knows Kate had a twin, and that she disappeared for a long time until they found her. She went straight to Arkham Asylum.

Kate clears her throat.

"I don't intend to share family trauma." Her hand fidgets on the table. "Listen, there's a tradition here in Wycombe we always do in the beginning of the year. Well, it's not only _our_ tradition. Eton College is part of it too."

Oh, please. Not Eton College.

Kate smiles as if knowing Lena's thoughts.

"There's an abandoned house in the middle of the woods." Lena tries not to scoff at how that sounds like the beginning of a tale. "I'm serious. It's empty. And it's right in the middle, between Wycombe Abbey and Eton College campus." She gestures with two fingers, like she was showing Lena the exact distance. "So, the students of both schools meet there and throw a big party."

Lena just stares, wide-eyed.

"That sounds an awful lot like a _bacchanalia_."

Kate laughs. Out loud.

"It is a bacchanalia. It's two British schools for god's sake." She says winking an eye, but then more serious, "but without the orgy part."

"Well, that's boring."

Kate's eyebrows go up, most likely surprised at her reaction.

"The point is, you can't get there on your own." She points a finger at Lena. "So I'm taking you."

Lena smiles at her.

"No, you aren't."

"C'mon! You can't miss it. It's the event that defines the rest of the gossips until the end of the year."

"I'm already a subject of gossip." She closes her textbook. No chances she'll be doing any reading again soon. "I'm good staying out of it."

"See? I know what you're doing." Kate is a little bit exasperated and Lena finds it amusing. "You are walking around like you're guilty. Like you did something wrong. That's what I did for a while, too. But if you let it, these people will treat you however they want forever. They'll step on you for reasons you never gave them."

There's so much truth in her voice, Lena can't breathe for a second. She never realized it. How she has been acting like she plunged that knife in Clark's meat herself. But, if she wants an excuse for herself, even Lillian acted like it was somehow Lena's fault Lex tried to kill his best friend. The tabloids never helped: _is the youngest Luthor a psycho as well?_ ", the family friends disappearing one by one... It all left a sensation lingering around Lena's chest. She never knew what to do with it.

"It's hard to get rid of this feeling." Kate continues, Lena watches her. "But don't stop living because of it."

Kate convinced her, but there are some scars that haven't healed enough.

"I'm guilty of _some_ things." She whispers.

She thinks of Kara. Of how everything went to hell between them.

"Well, but not of attempt of murder." Kate stands up, knocking her hand on the table like a judge hitting a gavel, and looks over to the librarian gesturing them to leave. Lena didn't notice it was this late, the library was closing. "I'm picking you up at Campbell by 9 p.m tomorrow, be ready." There's no question in her voice. Kate gives her a _thumbs up_ and walks away, leaving her alone with a grumpy librarian.

When she goes back to Campbell House, she doesn't hide her face like she usually did. Tries to borrow some of Kate's courage and stop carrying herself like a slog.

As she walks in, she spots Andrea standing near the fireplace, talking to a girl that was sitting in the armchair. She laughs and it's a sight so unusual to Lena she almost forgets it's her ex-girlfriend. By the time they broke up almost a year ago, they weren't smiling at each other anymore. It's like she couldn't remember Andrea had different expressions, other than snaring at her or–

Or, well, her faces while they were fucking.

Clearly, it was a very healthy relationship.

She stops lingering by the living room entrance and heads to her room. She's about to go in, wanting nothing more to sleep — she can't miss first morning classes anymore.

"Lena." It's Andrea.

She sighs but turns to the girl.

"I don't want to fight." Andrea preludes. "I just want to know if you have any questions about your detention." She was still her House Mother.

Lena raises an eyebrow.

"Perdon me?"

"Your detention?" Andrea is confused by Lena's confusion. They just stare at each other for a few seconds before Andrea concedes. "You didn't sleep in school grounds, that's punishable by detention."

Two realizations strike Lena.

One, Andrea wasn't the friend that asked a favor to Iris. Or else she would know the school board isn't aware of what she did. Two, if it wasn't Andrea...

Lena gulps and tries to not pay attention to how fast her heart is beating. She hates it, and it's about to be very angry at herself for her body's reaction. She catches Andrea's eyes again and she knows the girl notices something — she barks out a bitter chuckle.

"Guess your beloved took good care of you."

And with that, Andrea leaves.

Kate was right. She wasn't guilty of Lex's crimes. But there was a game of cat and mouse happening here. Where she and Kara were going to look for every way possible to poke each other where it hurts. It seems, though, Kara is in the same place they were when Clark bled over their relationship, and by that time, they weren't in a good place.

Kara is still trying to catch up from where they left off.

_She never let you go willingly._

Lena recalls Sam's words. She is familiar with this habit – everything Lena ever let go in her life has claws marks on it.

And Kara Danvers's skin was covered with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potes meos suaviari clones = you can kiss my ass  
> Podex perfectus es = you're a complete asshole.
> 
> yes, i know how to swear in latin. it's sexy.
> 
> okay, explanations! let's go:
> 
> 1\. right after i posted the prologue, i traveled unexpectedly to my hometown (i live away because of uni). i planned to stay there only a week but i ended up staying there three weeks instead. i didn't take my notebook with me, so i did no writing nor couldn't i post what i've already written. and i probably wouldn't have the time anyway, with my friends and family around. 
> 
> 2\. when i got home, it was march 4th. it was the start of quarantine in my country and i got terribly sick. and no, it wasn't coronavirus but it was a serious infection that got me stuck in bed for four weeks. i lost a serious amount of weight. it took it's toil in my mental health, to be honest. i wasn't in a good place. i'm okay now!
> 
> 3\. when i was okay again, it was supergirl what frustrated me. i got angry about how the supercorp fandom got treated again and got extremely sad about how the characters i love were being written on the show. this william dey bs really made me want to forget about supercorp... BUT!! in the end of the day, they're fictional characters. they belong to us. kara and lena love each other and who the hell cares when lena luthor is going to be serving some hot looks next episode?!! make some noise lesbians!!!
> 
> please, take care, stay home and wash your hands!! xx

**Author's Note:**

> *gasps* was that a plot twist at the end? can this be considered a plot twist? can a plot twist exist in a 4k prologue?!  
> well, i don't know. but hey, i tried.
> 
> please, let me know what you think. i love to interact.


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